knocked up

well. it seems that i am pregnant.

preg-WHAT?!

alvin and i have been officially trying to get pregnant since march. after getting my period month after month and one false alarm, we were half resigned that it might not happen at all, at least not ‘naturally’.

i’ve been putting off going to see a doctor to have our aging reproductive systems checked out because, well, i’m me and i’m lazy about these things. (don’t follow my example, people.) thankfully, the universe cut me some slack just when i thought there was no escaping getting ‘worked-up’.

we took a home pregnancy test thursday morning, roughly a week after i was supposed to get my period. watching that second purple line grow more and more visible was like helplessly giving my life permission to change forever.

aside from the missed period and a very, very slight queasy feeling at the pit of my stomach though, i felt nothing different. no fatigue, nausea or food aversions that all pregnancy websites said would be there.

i felt so normal that i began to doubt the result of the home pregnancy test. how reliable can a lightweight piece of rectangular hard plastic be, after all?

then i started reading up on being pregnant and all the things that could go wrong and actually hoped the test *was* wrong. how can they call pregnancy wonderful and in the same breath talk about spina bifida, anencephaly, and other possible fetal development problems? seriously.

and here i thought all i needed to brace myself for was the actual birth, which has been giving me nightmares since they made us watch that video during biology class (wide shot of woman giving birth. cut to extreme close up of something abstract and strangely damp. giant thing suddenly barrels out of abstract thing and then you realize that what you were staring at was a f*cking vagina! yes, *that* video. i’m sure you’ve all seen a similar version in school at some point in your lives.).

we finally went to a doctor to have it confirmed and now, i have sheets of thermal paper with black blobs along with a box with two purple lines as proof that i have a little alvinjona swimming inside me.

babysitting pledge forms are available at the door.

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