binny, are we sure i’m pregnant?
are we *sure*???
didn’t you hear the heartbeat last saturday?
was it clear? are you sure it was a heartbeat? it couldn’t have been anything else?!
12 weeks along and i still don’t feel pregnant.
i start my 9th week of pregnancy today and i have nothing to report.
oh, wait. there *is* one thing: alvin and i saw our six-week-plus-old embryo’s black and white heart flutter on the ultrasound screen. we celebrated by driving to marben’s canteen and attacking a giant bowl of bulalo.
i have to say, being pregnant isn’t how i imagined it would be. i envisioned dramatic spells of fainting, vomiting into stark white bathroom sinks, lying on the bed propped up by plump pillows, my face pale from the sacrifice motherhood demands.
instead, my everydays have been very normal. no fainting, no vomiting. well, i *am* a little pale but nowhere near the striking pallor i was hoping for. oh, and there is a bit of queasiness from time to time, but i feel like i’m scraping the bottom of the barrel here, desperately looking for ways to fit in with the rest of them normal pregnant women.
i feel so un-pregnant i sometimes wonder if somebody somewhere made a mistake in the diagnosis. then i remember the black and white heart flickering on the screen. surely, they couldn’t have mistaken the random flickering edge of an internal organ for an embryo’s heart, could they?
well, my breasts have been growing bigger, so that’s something.