wednesdays

wednesdays are my days off. not from work, but from motherhood. tuesdays, alvin and i load the kid, the nanny, and all things they might need for a couple of days and drive them over to alvin’s mom’s, where they stay until we pick them up thursday nights.

it started when i had to go back to work and we still didn’t have help. i would bring the baby with me to the office all other days of the work week, but couldn’t on wednesdays because we didn’t (don’t) have access to a car on that day. since i obviously couldn’t take wednesday off every week, we decided this was the best solution.

and it actually has been working out really well. so well, in fact, that it has become one of the things i cling on to during times when i’m certain that baby and work and life in general are conspiring really, really hard to make me lose my mind. 

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he is not always cute.

wednesday used to just be a day to me, now, it has come to mean a lot of different things. like sleep, and fuss-free laundry day, and quiet, and quality time with my husband (we can actually watch tv! together!). it is the only day of the week when the idea of a life before the baby came doesn’t seem that far-fetched, that we lived a different life and it was not just a product of my sleep-deprived brain’s imagination.

my mother-in-law and sister-in-law, bless their baby-loving hearts, are thrilled with the set-up as well, because they get to spend time with the baby.

which explains why the to-and-fro continued even after the nanny arrived; it was just too precious for all of us to give up.

also, and this is now the paranoid mother in me talking, i never rest easy leaving the baby with just the nanny alone in the house. so many incredibly dangerous/unexpected/scary things might/could happen and having two whole, worry-free days feels indescribably good.

most importantly, the distance i travel away from my baby each week brings just enough perspective to make me realize over and over again that, despite the baby tantrums and the punishingly long hours and the occasional urge to just walk out the door and never return, becoming a mom is a decision i do not regret.

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but then, he does this, which negates all other annoying things he might have done.

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